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Trust
Liz: Here's a little bit more about trust. I think we may have discussed this common human challenge sometime within the last 60 days so you might want to take a spin through the archives.
Problems with trust often have roots in childhood, yet they can occur in early adulthood as well. Kids and people can be abused and this can be very emotionally impactful. Emotions of fear, extreme anger, hate, betrayal, and shame can be present with distrust.
Abuse, the root of mistrust, can often be repressed from awareness. However a strong flavor of mistrust is there. This mistrust can be generalized to other persons. Example: "All men are rats." "Those people are always sneaks--we have to watch them night and day."
It's great to trust people, but we also better keep a sharp eye. Not everyone has good intentions for us or is honest. People better exercise some discernment. Basically I trust most people until I get an intuition otherwise. The challenge with pathological mistrust it is applied broadly to everyone--trusting no one. It tests. It generalizes to specific people like all men are or all women are. With this kind of mistrust our guard is always up. Even the slightest infraction or the misperception of one can paint someone quickly as untrustworthy.
People who mistrust are often abusive.
There's a tendency to see ulterior motives and that people are attempting to manipulate you. Relationships can be viewed as dangerous.
The odd thing is folks, who are profoundly distrusting, seem like powerful magnets for attracting abusive folks into their lives and relationships. Often people who mistrust strongly have psychological blindspots for abusers. They will minimize certain negative aspects of a partner and maximize certain positive aspects. Then they will certainly be abused again.
Here is the Personality Cluster: Abuse/Expectation of Bad Treatment: This cluster provides a sense that others will abuse, cheat, decieve, humiliate, hurt, or take advantage of us. Beliefs are:
* I must be totally guarded around others.
* People will use me.
* People only act nice when they want something.
* Soon someone will betray me.
* People will emotionally, physically, or sexually abuse me.
* I must be vigilant for other people's tricks.
* People close to me will hurt me.
* I have to test others because they are untrustworthy.
* People only think about themselves.
* I'd be a fool to trust someone.
* Most people are liars and cheats.
* I do it to them before they do it to me.
* Take control or be controlled.
* I'm angry about how others have used me.
* Something's wrong with me if I get treated this way.
* It's my fault I've been abused or tricked.
These are potential targets for clearing. Feel the feelings engendered by these beliefs and utilize those feelings for clearing.
We better exercise some discernment in modern life as not everyone has our best interests in mind. However to have a profound sense of mistrust and fear of people can make life toil. Personality Clusters that contain mistrust beliefs are fine targets for clearing.
Take care, Steve